Sunday, May 15, 2011

I would if I could

The days go by and you just do what you have to do.  I had some trouble this week and realized I was just dealing with it and not sharing it.  Sometimes I do forget that there are others out there that may be helped by my posts, so here goes.

Thursday was the 3rd week since my surgery.  I'm coming along pretty well.  The drains came out and the entry areas are healing.  They were located at my sides just about 4 inches below my arm pits and have been a little swollen and sore but getting better.  The soreness made it very difficult to wear a bra since the elastic pushed right against the areas. 

Sleeping was still hard for me.  Being a stomach sleeper, the urge to roll over can happen all night.  I couldn't even consider sleeping on my stomach because I couldn't get past my sides!  So it was another several nights of sleeping on my back - uncomfortably.

Worse than all that are the temporary implants.  I can feel them all day.  They are kind of heavy and a little sore against my chest wall.  I had to go buy a couple of new bras because the ones I usually wear don't fit the shape of the ones I'm 'sporting' now.  The expanders are filled with enough saline to make me a B-cup which is where I want to end up.  Dr. S will fill a little more, I'm afraid, to have enough skin to work with.  I was kind of surprised that I have 'boobage' under my armpit!  But, that's where the extra skin is going to come from to create the finished products. 

Back to where I left off.... I can feel them all day but it's tolerable.  It's nighttime that bothers me still.  I had several days in a row where only an hour or two of sleep came over me.  Same thing as I described in a previous post - I would finally settle into a comfortable position and suddenly my legs would get jumpy.  Restless leg syndrome.  By Thursday - I had had it.  Lucky Bob got to see my little sleep-deprived breakdown in full force.  I was ready to get these things out of me!  If I could take them out myself, I would.  It was that bad.

I used one of my Ambien's that night and that helped alot. A good night sleep can make everything better.  I still want to get these temporary ones out - they feel like bags of peanut m&m's moving around in there. 

Friday, we met with Dr. Doogie, Dr. Koutcher the very 'young' radiologist, and after our meeting he spoke with Dr. Sepulveda directly to discuss timing of the radiation vs. permanent implant surgery.  Dr. Doogie reported back to me that Dr. S said radiation first, then wait 6 months for surgery!  6 MONTHS!!! I cannot wait 6 months with these keeping me up at night!  While things get a little better every day, if he can't tell me they will feel better soon, like within a few weeks, then I want them out!

I have a meeting with Dr. S tomorrow.... I gotta get the story straightened out.


Wendy S. Marcus said...

Hugs, Mary. Big gentle ones.

Sharon said...

Mary, I have been reading your posts and you are so special, straight forward and brave! Happy anniversary! With love, Sharon Burns