Always in the back of my mind...

Office party at the Junction 52 was not quite how we expected it to be... lousy food, no heat, no other people.  It didn't seem to matter, though.  We just decided we'd make the best of it and never go back!  Afterward, Alex and I went to see Elisa for another acupuncture session.  She was as excited as we were that my wbc counts were up so high!  As usual, we both felt very good leaving.

Sarah made a delicious dinner for us tonight.  How lucky are we??? While I was enjoying dessert, I scratched my head a bit and in my hand was a bunch of hair.  I do believe it's beginning.... scary.

I put that thought behind me as best as I could and Bob and I went off to do a little shopping for the first time this year!  I didn't last long, about an hour.  It was good to get out though.  I bought myself another hat - just in case.  Back on my mind.  Merry Christmas to me.

Bob wants us to both shave our heads before I actually lose it - a solidarity thing.  It's really hard for me to face that reality.  Once Christmas is over, I'll consider it.  I've already cut it, but having it be very very short may be easier when it starts to fall out.  I don't know - maybe a crew cut...

Prepping for tonight

Last dance night before the holiday break means our traditional party with goofy games and gift swap.  We all get a little crazed during the party and it just cracks me up.  I end up leaving with my face hurting so bad from smiling so much! Sarah is counting and wrapping stuff for me.  I'm bringing latkas as my food contribution and dreidels too.  I feel less stressed this year for some reason.... feels good!

Working a few hours more... it's been a good day.  A few appointments and lots of emails done.  I must be on an upward swing - Day 12 AC#1.  I'm beginning to think of days in groups of 21 - that works for me.

Another day at the office, sure!

The day started off pretty well - meeting with a client went pretty smooth.  Answered a few emails.  Did my usual Monday morning time billing, accounting review, employees, schedules for the week, etc.  Then it hit me - it was 1pm and it might as well could have been midnight!  Out of the blue, I was fried.  My mental capacity totally slowed to a creep.  Decided lunch might be a good idea, but it was not much help.  The 'sales boys' came to my desk to discuss an issue with a client and Bob could tell I was not myself.  "Tired?" he asked.  I just shook my head.  I called for Sarah to take me home so I could setup for my afternoon appointments from there. 

Maybe the change in scenery helped?  I seemed to perk up a bit when I got home.  As I've reported before, I seem to be clearer at the end of the day. 

Maybe it was Sarah?  Could have been... it's nice to have her home. 

So I finished my day at the office - at home.  I think this is the way it's going to be.  Not bad.

Home again

Went to see Dr. Rubin, my incredibly talented Oncologist! (I know he and his mother are reading this!!!) Seriously, I think he's great - so, if you ever need a good Oncologist.... (said in my best yiddish accent!!) Oy vey!

Anyway, the news is white blood cell (wbc) count dropped dramatically to 900 or .9.  As a point of reference, before I had chemo last week, they were 6,000 or 6.0.  Right now, they didn't have the results that breaks down the different types of wbc's yet.  They will let me know those numbers when they are available.  With this low a wbc count, it makes me very susceptible to infection.  A condition called Neutropenia.  No big crowds, no mall shopping, no holiday craziness for me! 

Bob took one look at me and said "You are going home!" So - here we are.  I'm setting up to work from home more often then I thought we'd need to.  Currently we are sitting at the dining room table with our laptops, cell phones, etc.  I'll get office phones and other stuff more organized soon.  There are a few pluses to being home - I actually cooked dinner last night!  I can't remember the last time I cooked on a Wednesday... still thinking...

Better get to work.

Jay to the rescue!!!

So today I ventured into the office.  I had a few meetings lined up and with my usual effort would not have been a problem.  There was nothing 'usual' about today.  What I quickly realized was during my first appt at 9:30am that I couldn't think straight enough to help my customer!!  I'm so used to doing 10 things at once, that the effort to talk on the phone, connect to their machine and navigate ANYTHING was too much for me.... Thank god for Jay!

I turned to my left and said 'I need help' - Jay was on it.  I graciously explained to my customer that I was having 'issues' without really explaining my issues... and passed them to Jay.  Jay and I worked as a tag team - the only way I could have gotten through it.  I find my mind is foggy and my thoughts are way too scattered to do any really heavy duty consulting right now.  Hopefully, that will get better.  I do notice I get clearer throughout the day.  Note to self - book yourself in the afternoon - at least for now...